The Millennial Dream
Everyone’s always talking about the “American Dream” we were promised: House with a white picket fence, married (no one cared if it was happily), a “nice” car, 2.5 kids (no one knows what the hell that means), and a “good” job.
I personally don’t think that was a promise for millennials. We were promised “Grown and Sexy”. Just think about the shows we’re steam binging now: How I Met Your Mother, Girlfriends, Sex and the City, Half and Half, Friends. We were promised a safe big city life where locked doors were optional. We were promised clinking cosmos and gossip at least 3 times a week. We were promised being the youngest junior partner at our law firm. We were promised our wingman pushing us into love of both of our lives. These shows told us: national disasters don’t exist; we’d perpetually be in a love triangle; life is the same after having children; you’d be successful in your career by 30; there’s always time (and energy) for sex; aaaand your friends would literally always be there. Most of these broken promises are easily forgivable, I mean, we literally watched 9/11, Katrina, a pandemic, and many an election result get ignored, plus who wants that many cosmos, right? It’s that last broken promise that hurts that most, like, where the hell are our Joey hugs, you know.
Most of us didn’t get the dream job out of college (a lot of us aren’t even making money in our desired field). Most of us don’t live a few feet away from our confidants. Most of us can’t sit in the bar/coffee shop/ restaurant for hours in the middle of the week. Most of us can’t afford to feed Lin/Joey. Most of us don’t have the love life of Marshall and Lily. Most of us are lonelier more often than expected. Grown and sexy was supposed to be independent co-dependence and instant gratification, but instead it’s grinding to pay bills and a whole lot of phone tag. I know, I know, “that just sounds like adulting, and perpetually missing your friends”. Honestly, getting to the freedom of grown and sexy takes a lot of adulting and a hell of a lot more self-care.
“I'll be there for you (When the rain starts to pour)”, and we can “Pa pa pa pa pa da da da da”, but “Through this journey of discovery… finding you and finding me”, life won’t just happen for us while we gossip in the city; we actually have to make plans and set goals. The real grown and sexy are the parts we weren’t shown: it’s the grind; it’s supporting small moments you can’t physically be there for; it’s catching up after a month of phone tag; its working a job you hate to pay for a career you love; it’s giving yourself space to think without input; it’s choosing your partner daily; it’s loving others without losing yourself.
The Millennial dream is not what it seemed, but if you laugh when it’s hard, and remind yourself, “This is probably, only, season 3”, you’ll realize you are more grown and a hell of a lot sexier than you think. In this blog I will combine my life experiences with what I’ve learned from way too much binging. I will include all the ranting, loving, and creativity you expect from this creative soul, but this is no sitcom, so disasters will occur. Are you ready to rant through life with me?